Paul explained to the believers at Ephesus that the primary role of the father in the family is to train their children in the ways of the Lord. He wrote, “…bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.” (Ephesians 6:4b, NIV). It is the responsibility of every father to use his authority and influence as a father to saturate the lives of his children with “the training and instruction of the Lord.” You may feel inadequate and ill-equipped for this monumental task, but it remains, none-the-less, your responsibility. A few techniques you can use are—model simple Biblical principles for your children; make regular attendance at a local church that has a strong teaching ministry a priority (don’t allow non-kingdom activities to interfere with Sunday worship at your local church); lead a family devotion every day; and take advantage of those teachable moments that occur daily in the lives of your children by talking about what Jesus would do in a given situation. You don’t have to be a seminary graduate to do these things—but you do have to be a committed father. Being a godly father is hard work! The role of a father who truly wants to “bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord” is extremely time-consuming. In fact, it must become a lifestyle. That’s how Moses described the father’s role to the ancient nation of Israel. He wrote, “These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home [during your leisure time] and when you walk along the road, [when you are traveling] when you lie down [at bedtime] and when you get up [first thing in the morning] …Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.” (Deuteronomy 6:6-7…9, NIV). Fatherhood is not simply something you do. It is a lifestyle you live! I am amazed that before telling fathers to “bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord,” Paul first warned, “Fathers, do not exasperate your children…” (Ephesians 6:4a, NIV). The word “exasperate” is translated from a Greek word that means “to irritate, to cause intense anger, to cause resentment.” One of the most common mistakes I see fathers make in their parenting style is exasperating their children—especially their teens. Sometimes teens are exasperated when fathers try to use a combination of humor and embarrassment to manipulate their behavior. At other times teens are exasperated when fathers give them stern, authoritative verbal discipline in public. Most often, the discipline of a teen should be a private matter between the teen and his father. In either case, when the teen is exasperated, resentment results, communication stops, the parent/child relationship is damaged, and the father’s ability to “bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord” suffers.